How to conquer the fear of failure

Have you ever suffered from the fear of failure that prevents you from doing things you like to develop or progressing towards your desired goals? 

You don´t dare to perform outside your comfort zone because You may have in the past failed in many areas and been humiliated by your surrounding or judged by your ego. This will lead you to already predict the worst scenario, even before started.

If you do recognize all of these signs, then you are suffering from the fear of failure.

In this article, we are talking about what the fear of failure is and how it can affect your achievement and creativity in life. There will be suggestions on how to think around it and be positive despite we sometimes defining ourselves not being successful all the time, laid out later on in this post. 

What is the fear of failure?

The fear of failure we can say is like a state of mind in terms of already predicting the outcome of losing or failing before even once started or attending to one specific task in mind. The syndrome can even be called antichyphobia. 

In other words, when having antichyphobia You cannot move on with one task demanding a certain accomplishment without having negative thoughts, anxiety, worrying, depression, and being stressed about it. 

All of your actions for some reason in the back of your head have to be perfect constantly. Or otherwise, you will rather avoid it through procrastination or in the worst case not taking any action at all due to the tiredness of worrying. 

You have an inner voice to be reminded about not being good enough in everything you do. Then you start to feel bad especially only thinking about your failures in the past or start to compare yourself to others why have they done it but not you? 

You are also afraid of what other people will think about you if you will not bring any success at all. Your self-doubting starts to dominate and you can´t even allow yourself to make any mistakes while learning to grow in the future.

Therefore you will avoid as much as you can those projects containing risks to lose or fail and not being successful in front of others at all. All of your future actions have to be 100% perfect and safe to accomplish at a high cost to your health, otherwise, you will not attend anything else either.

Map out thoughts and clarify them through feelings and actions

Sometimes it is better for you to just explain why you are so afraid to fail and that you have to do it anyway. Your main purpose isn´t suddenly now just being successful for yourself, but to be seen as perfect and successful as possible in the eyes of the beholder.

Especially when it comes to that you know you will be criticized and judged if you are not achieving the task and seems to look like a fool when something goes wrong. It is like you have some kind of invisible judge in your head, always reminding you not to be worthwhile if you are not in your best shape every time. In time you will also be very sensitive to critics and can´t any longer distinguish the relevance from the bad once.

You start to form such a self-defending reaction about doing anything else but not going through the task believing a huge risk to fail. This is by procrastination and avoidance to do anything differently without any hard effort involved to strive towards your goals settled up first all. 

Now it is time for you to analyze what it means to your life in the long term when you are not doing the things you should do. If you intend to procrastinate and choose to do so, what kind of consequence does it bring to you later on? What happens to your training in the journey of life and will you in so lose all of your purpose and clarity about how you want to have your life be more meaningful?

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Make a positive view of the point out of failure

Now it is time to have some positive aspects in failing. If you don´t die from it, what can the worst scenario be otherwise learn to be more prepared and stronger the next time. 

If you now have an insight from not being attached to what others think about you, especially when they don´t provide anything valuable in your life anyway, why still bother right? 

And imagine when you allow yourself to still be worthwhile and to be kind to yourself despite doing mistakes. And if you don´t have anything to lose, but mainly intake new knowledge and improve by constant practice to be where you would like to be, why should you quit and give up anyway?

You can also say to yourself instead of losing all those ways when not succeeding, you have just found as many ways as possible to learn and grow in the future, and especially you will do things better and differently.

And now when you were once allowed to be kind to yourself you can also start diminishing being jealous of everybody else´s success. You can now immediately in contrast to before see their achievement as something inspiring and maybe you want to be near them to have the same success as well. 

Be focused on your goals when the fear kicked in

Every time you are scared of being a fool in front of your criticized self and everybody else that may have some opinions about you, you better focus when only thinking about your most important goal in the nearest time ahead. 

Think about why you started the whole project in the first place?

What do you want to achieve and map out what actions to take to be able to get what you want in the end?

Now when you are more aware of what to do and how your willingness to procrastinate will also be lesser. You can now also not think about being ashamed for not passing the test as before. And the state of mind for focusing on opportunities rather than issues can also be your nicest friend along away when you need a break or searching for additional tools and guidance to be closer to your goal.

Strengthen your ability to see the good qualities in you

When have been nice and kind to yourself enough, You can also start seeing the good qualities in yourself. 

Think about your journey and how much you have grown since then, from the beginning. If you still not have given up, then one of your greatest qualities should be not being a quitter as soon as some of the small obstacles started to show up for sure. You can still stay strong when things start to get difficult and tougher. After this, you are suddenly solution-oriented and hungry for finding another way to go around those issues. 

As long as you still moving no matter how slow or fast, you will always improve some of the good qualities in you and even be required to go to the finish line, instead of being still. 

Break your most significant goal into smaller milestones

Many times You only see the whole project that you have to go through a huge and high like mount Everest and your habit of procrastination started to kick in. To avoid distraction you better divide the whole project into smaller milestones and reward your performance on every single small one to have better motivation and that you can feel more joyful going on to complete it.

 One of the very good tools to do so is to write a to-do list. Try to include all of the most important steps in it and mark when every one of them has been finished. In so you can also feel that your task will not be so infinite becoming impossible to deal with.

Daily practice on body and mind to find calm

When You tend to overwork yourself and do feel a higher level of stress hormones, don´t forget to take a break and attend to health caring activities to nutrition and feed all new and positive energies to your body and mind. 

You can for example start to meditate daily to calm your mind and even rest your body and soul for having a more sustainable mindset along the way.

You can also begin to listen to a motivational podcast or read about the positive having habit of thinking. Be enlightening by the people you admire and according to you have become successful and expertise in their field and that you also want to become the same one day. 

Don´t forget to exercise and train as much as you can to have more robust health and feed your body with a lot of endorphins, hormones that will strengthen your immune system and later on create a better mental condition for not easily have a breakdown. 

Get professional help on antichyphobia

When you are suspicious about having antichyphobia, You better recover quicker from being long-term depressed when consulting with a professional help giver in a psychiatrist area about this. 

You can be suggested to have a determined period a health care plan to heal from. Until then You will both be provided with needed medications and maybe cognitive treatment to get rid of your anxiety, depression, and worrying about future tasks. You will in so have a higher chance to keep your health to be stable during the time too.

Storytelling your case with a more encouraging tone

You can even rewrite your end story with more encouraging and positive words and meaning instead of saying “Because of my failure on the first task, I will be doomed to have the same outcome for my entire life” to “Because of my failing at first attempt, it doesn´t mean I will forever fail on the same task later on”

or “If I haven´t received any result as I wished, but in the end, I do learn a lot and can be much stronger prepared and have a huge chance to make it on the next time when doing the same again”

Questioning yourself three questions about failure

  • how can I learn from this?

Has the project I recently have been through, brought me some valuable lessons in my life, and, how I can in the future have a better understanding of what I have learned from this and how I can later do differently to have better results in a similar task of doing. 

Will the learning from my experience will change for a better outcome later on and can I use it several times on other projects with a similar mindset and planning?

What was my trial and error after this?

  • what experience do I get from this?

What are those skillsets I have taken from the project that I can take more advantage of in the future? 

Can I become more successful and have a higher risk of winning campaigns while having gathered the skill sets?

Will I be much better prepared the next time?

Does my ability to analyze when taking all of the pros and cons into consideration in new projects improve. Has my insight of new aspects of things been wider?

  • what are the three positive aspects of this?
  1. Do I have achieved my goal if not, have I figured out how can I do this in a shorter matter of time?
  2. If not have gathered any results, can the learning curve be my best friend right now to encourage me to keep my goal going on without losing the faith to give up?
  3. Will my ability for being solution-oriented help me to find new opportunities for a new game-changer in my life?

Conclusion and final thoughts

Are you the one who has suffered from the fear of failure and it prevents you to stop taking any necessary action towards your goal, then you also may have a diagnosis of antichyphobia?

The syndrome of antichyphobia will be as soon as you may feel the emotions of risk of being a failure during a task which may demand you to accomplish through your performance, then you rather avoid it than attend. 

You start immediately to have negative thoughts about it. Also with anxiety, worrying, and a tendency to be depressed, procrastinate, and then have huge anxiety for not having done the task you have planned for.

This condition is mostly according to my personal opinions a learned behavior from our surroundings at a very early age, for constantly being rewarded for our accomplishments. This is very understandable according to how society constantly rewards us for high achievement and with speeding in work effort.

And then when we have come to a phase in the life of not having much success as expected, we will be scared and ashamed both in front of our self-ego and maybe in front of others for not doing so. 

Then it is very important to either get professional help care and treatment so You can get quick recovery from the antichyphobia or that You can for yourself to see the failure as your best friend to become someone better new version of yourself independent from others’ opinions about the definition about yourself worth.

Every learning curve you have gone through is not a loss but will create better conditions for you to take on future tasks and have a more meaningful to it when you are working on your goals. 

 Every time you feel any distraction to have procrastination remind yourself why you started with the project in the first place. If you decide to not procrastinate through your actions, lay out what those consequences will come to your life and what destination will they take you to?

I truly hope You will find what you have searched for through this post about how you can conquer your fear of failure and dare to get out of your comfort zone when required to grow and become a better version of yourself and can possibly pass on to others to do the same as well.

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To your success!

Nanina

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